› Funny Quotes
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Saint Augustine
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
Dave Barry
The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
Dave Barry
It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.
Robert Benchley
I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.
Robert Benchley
Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
Yogi Berra
A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.
Yogi Berra
If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.
Yogi Berra
I never said most of the things I said.
Josh Billings
Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
Josh Billings
There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together.
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